The worst things to hear when planning a wedding

Whilst I was visiting my grandma last week, I was excitedly telling her about our Wedding planning progress and eager to show her some pictures of the venue. My grandma is all for anything fancy, at 86 she still dresses to impress and she fancies herself as a Royal herself. So I believed she would be excited too about the prospect of staying in a luxurious hotel and spa for the night.  Oh but I was wrong…20170522_193012.jpg


First off she didn’t like staying away from home – anymore, she only likes the comfort of her own bed. This is fair enough, she is getting old, her eye sight is going and the safety of her own home is a comfort to her. I get that. Though she continued to make excuses, which no longer meant she did not want to stay the night in our hotel as we had planned, but in fact meant she no longer wanted to attend the wedding at all.

“what is the age range of the older guests.” She asked,  I explained as it is a small family wedding there will be my grandparents and Carl’s grandparents. She looked distraught at this information, “Just as I had thought, so how old are they?” she asked tutting. I explained that they are about ten years younger than her. She now looked horrified and went on to say that she did not know if she could come to the wedding (of her only granddaughter) as she did not fancy been the eldest there! Sorry Grandma but your my grandma, not my bridesmaid, we just cannot find any older relatives!!

So having had this conversation I took to the bridal boards and groups I am religiously checking on now that I am a ‘bride to be’ and asked all Bride to be’s,

What is the worst thing you’ve heard since planning a wedding?

And this was their response.

So first up, as anyone planning a wedding will know – food is massive part of the day, the biggest headache and the biggest cost by far!


“My mother in law took great offence that we would not be serving hot food. She tried to tell us that all the old people will starve and be cold. I somehow kept my cool to politely inform her that the cold food will be just as filling and that if it is a cold day, our venue has got heating.

“My husband to be’s aunt has informed us that she is really looking forward to the breakfast the next day!” – I bet your glad your forking out for a 3 course meal for her!

“One guest has said that her 5 year old couldn’t possibly eat from the children’s menu and will have to eat from the adult’s. Ermmm nope, at £15 EXTRA, he won’t!!”

Though opposite to this…

“I had one guest state they did not like anything on the adult menu and would just mine sweep the children’s plates!”

“We had one guest who asked if we were having a sweet buffet and requested that we have gummy bears as that’s her other halves favourite – we have never met her boyfriend!”


Photography is a massive part of the wedding, after your perfect day has gone and all you are left is your memories, you want these shown in your beautiful carefully chosen photos, photos you have spent months agonising which must have shots you will be having, photos you have idealised on Instagram – In the most expensive day of your life photography is not something that costs should be cut on. Despite this some very helpful relatives have said…

“My soon to be mother in law said a photographer was pointless because her IPhone could take just as good photos. I was left speechless, a photographer was in my top 5 important things!”

“My grandma helpfully offered to take photos at our wedding and get rid of the photographer to save a few pennies. I have witnessed this lady trying to take family photos at Christmas and the outcome is not good!”

“My nan said she will take photos for us on the day, though the idea of just having photos of cut off heads make me come out in a cold sweat.”

“My dad offered to take the photos as he has a good camera, to be fair he is really quite good, though I cannot really imagine my family group photos without him in, that or him taking selfies throughout the day!”

“My mum found out that there will be 2 guests that will be 7 months pregnant and asked if I could request that the photographer takes a photo of her standing with them, so she will look slim in at least one photo!”


From the moment you say engaged, your head is immediately filled with images of beautiful brides, you frantically search for the dream look and the pressure is on to look like a princess on this special day.

This been said…remember your fiancé is marrying you for you, despite what you hear…

“Quite a number of people have asked if I am going to dye my hair more blonde for the wedding, baring in mind I have never dyed my hair ever in my life!”

“I got asked if I was going to stop putting colours in my hair, the answer is yes… but I told them that I would dye it to match my colour scheme. I think there will be a few raised eyebrows.”

“People keep asking me if I am going to get hair extensions, I’ve had short hair for about 11 years, why would I change it for one day?!”

“My mother in law asked if she could get a perm, but has also asked if I am having my hair up or down as she wants hers different to mine, she went on to say that this is because she is worried I will be offended if we look similar. There is no way we will look similar – I will be the one with the one in the white dress!”

“My great grandma told me I need to tan more before the wedding as she thinks I will be to pale to wear a white dress.”

in opposition to this…

“My mum told me under no circumstance am I to get a fake tan (I am very pale skinned) as I will look like a hooker on my wedding day!”

“My nan asked whether I would be wearing the same dress from my first wedding!”


Families who’s have them…

“On the day of my wedding my big sister told me I was selfish to get married on a Saturday, when I know she drinks on a Friday! She then spent the whole service watching videos on Facebook!”

“My aunt RSVP’d as “Mrs pretty pretty princess” She also requested that om the day everyone is to address her by this name – there will be only one princess on my big day I’ll assure you of that!”

“My fiancé has asked if he can have a sword fight with my dad at the alter and the winner wins my hand.” He has been watching far to many movies, but it sounds brilliant!


And finally old people say it best…

“My nana said, after receiving our save the date for August 2018, that she won’t be making any plan in case she is not around anymore. (She is a fighting fit 86year old with no health issues.)

“My granddad said upon receiving his invite “yes of course we will be there…unless we die in the meantime!”

“When my grandma found out that he had proposed on valentines day she said, “well at least if you split up you can keep your ring because he gave you it on a holiday.” always thinking positive!!

“We get married in August (3 months) my fiancé’s Gran said she will do her best to make it but cannot promise and will let us know nearer the time” – she has got a good social life clearly!!

“Whilst discussing the wedding with my brother who works overseas and does not yet know if he will be able to get the time off, my grandma chirped in and said, “oo you do make it difficult for us all, it is really hard to plan a wedding around other things, I have got a lot on too that month.” – She really doesn’t, the possibility of her missing antiques roadshow is high though other than that, there is nothing.

“My gran asked me to change the month as she doesn’t think she will look good in a coat in the photos and doesn’t really want to fork out on  a new one!”

“My nan said if she happens to die before the wedding we should just leave her on ice and bury her once its all over, she doesn’t want people to worry about the funeral before my wedding!”